Wednesday, June 6, 2007

Here it goes again...

i feel shitty. i hate to feel like tis. my working life sucks i tell you... so much that i dread to go to work every morning. well, not so much on the job but more on the environment and the people im working with. they are so different from me. totally outta my league.

i feel suffocated at work. at my desk. my mentor, let's just call her A in here. im here at tis place to replace her who is going on maternity leave next week. so practically i gotta learn up her stuff in 3 weeks time whatever she learnt for the past one year. pregnant women tend to be more grumpy and short tempered... can you imagine my learning experience?

what makes my life even more sucky apart from being on a contractual basis job is that the department im working in will be relocating to Bukit Tengah in a months' time. i think the manager is not being ethical by NOT informing me about this relocation thingy during the interview. why the hell do i wanna work in the mainland instead of the island? why do i need to bear the additional cost?

and there is no parking lots for me over here. i gotta park my already-scarred baby kelisa in any space available. got 2 saman for the week already. gone is my RM100. what the fuck right? how bad can one's life be?

i wanna leave and get myself another job. a normal job. a job that pays my bills. not working to pay the saman bills. puki. im so fucking stressed if you wanna know... my future employers cant even get to me now as im working in a fucking basement of a fucking warehouse. there's no network connection down there. i cant receive even a fucking call at all. can you fucking believe my luck?

and my colleagues... they are the strangest people i've ever met in my life. they dont eat lunch. even if they do, it'll be cookies or some kuih throughout the whole day. their eyes never left their pc. they dont go out for lunch due to the lack of parking. and when they do go out... they go out to pack their food back to the office instead of enjoying their lunch outside. and we are not allowed to bring food into our office... so basically they are eating in fear everyday. what's the fucking point? i mean... you are already out... why the fuck do you pack it back to eat at the stupid office? in front of your work station? fuck them really... oh btw, i had lunch in my car yesterday. alone.

i so wanna leave tis trashy place. god, i'll do anything to get outta here. i cant fucking breathe in here ok. i've got a few options available but i cant really decide. i hate new environments. i hate re-adjusting myself again. but tis place is a god forsaken place. i lose more than i gain. in monetary and non monetary terms.

god help me... im so lost =(

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